“Cullybackey Auld Number,” I wonder who you are?
I don’t think you live, from Cullybackey far,
In verse you try to imitate the Scotch-
And on “Themes in General,” you make a total botch.

Things in general, you try to illustrate,
But corner street preachers, you seem to hate;
You think they have all broken over the trace,
I beseech you to ask God for more of His grace.

You cannot thole what Christ Himself practised:
You are like a silly body, wrongly advised;
Wise men are not afraid to face the foe
David, with sling and stone, soon laid Goliath low.

Why envy the preacher, if he butters his bread,
Or takes his wanes to the Church, to be chirst’ned or wed?
Christ sent the Apostles, to preach and baptise,
Even one of them, went off and told lies.

You speak of the old year, which is gone like the wind;
And, according to you, the Church is behind;
An uncharitable spirit is apt to complain,
As if Christ’s ambassadors are working for gain.

Your verse is amusing, for young girls and boys,
As you seem to be pleased with their fiddles and toys;
Take a few friendly hints, as the day is far dawn,
And if the show won’t fit, don’t put it on.

Random Rhymer,
Ballymena Observer
3rd May 1893

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