WILLIE

WILLIE

I met a young boy called Willie
He was fat and not very big
He owned a house and a wee bit of land
And a horse, a cow and a pig
Now Willie was a wee bit stingy
To me it was just so funny
When him and me went out for a day
He always held on to the money
We decided to go to a party
So I dressed in my Sunday best
Thought Willie would turn up respectable
With a dickie-bow stuck to his chest
I stood at the door and I waited
For Willie to arrive in a suit
But he arrived in his bib and brace
And a pair of hob nailed boots
When I saw him I was really affronted
So I made my way through the crowd
When Willie tried to get in through the door
They said no bib and braces allowed.
Now Willie had never a motor car
Not even a deacent bike
He came to see me on Shanks mare
In the middle of broad day light
Willie lived with his ma and sister
I thought them a wee bit odd
When he asked me to go and visit them
I just gave a wink and a nod
He thought he would like to get married
So he asked me to be his wife
I says Willie do you know what you’re doing
You’ll be tied up for the rest of your life
He thought and he thought and he pondered
And then he says maybe you’re right
So that was the end of Willie and me
On that very eventful night.

Nan Anderson

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